Thursday, January 22

Here's Your Sign

Right before sitting down to eat dinner last night.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

Renter: The fan in the bathroom won't shut off! I've shut the breaker off to the whole house, it's still going. I'm afraid that something is very wrong, and it might cause a fire.

Landlording Husband: What? If you shut the breaker off, nothing would be on. Bathroom vent is definitely not hardwired to the electric pole. Are you sure?

Renter: Yes.

Landlording Husband: Let me grab some clothes, and I'll be over.


Landlording Husband arrives at rent house. Goes in to bathroom which is in disarray as though a temper tantrum has taken place. Switch to bathroom vent has popped out of wall as though someone has possibly punched it.

Landlording Husband, hearing a humming noise along with feeling slight vibration, looks where noise is coming from. The bathtub.

Landlording Husband: I see the problem.

He points to an electric razor vibrating around in the tub.

Renter: Oh.

Landlording Husband: Have you been drinking?

Renter: No. I wish I had.

Landlording Husband: Did you punch the light switch?

Renter: No. Hey, we may have to break our lease. I might have a job offer.


AAAAALLLLLLRIIIIIGHT then.

Clearly not a job offer as an electrician or an detective!!

12 comments:

  1. Laughing my ass off! You just can't make this up. A razor was in the tub?! Bwahahahaha!! I would have been pissed! I hope your husband didn't have to drive very far to the rental property, and right before dinner, too. Ugh!

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  2. Akilah, Definitely cannot be made up. No, the house is very close by, but Tim was pissed. I can only imagine the look he gave the guy. hahahahaha. WTH?

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  3. LOL. Wow. Are you sure you didn't rent to the meth addicts?

    word verification: flestoto

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  4. Oh my gosh how hysterical. You have to send that to a magazine to get published. Gosh your poor husband. It might be a good thing if they leave the house after all. Imagine what more damage they could do. Like before you know it the police might be contacting you to say they found an electrocuted body in the bath tub with some electrical appliance. LOL

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  5. I really, really, really wanted there to be a dildo in the bathtub. That would have been awesome!

    This story is precisely why I will never be a landlord. Its like being a mother to people you don't like.

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  6. Mo- I'm really beginning to wonder about their sobriety. Atleast they're not cooking it. That's always a plus. flestoto, hahaha

    Lilly, that's exactly what Tim is thinking. I just hate when things are in limbo, but the whole thing is hilarious.

    Sharon, LMAO. Woman, you crack me up. Yes, a dildo would have been perfect. And if that's not the most perfect description of being a landlord, I don't know what is.

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  7. I think your husband deserves the "Landlord of the Year Award" for keeping his cool with those people! And you do too! How completely and totally annoying!!!

    word verification: borimbe
    Which somehow makes me think of a stiff drink. Not sure why. :) You know me. I am sure you are REALLY not sure why. hee hee

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  8. Just kick them out now before it gets worse. Buncha crackheads.

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  9. Chris, Tim was livid, and now wants to sell the house. I'm really proud of him for the way he handled it though. I forgot to mention that several weeks ago, the guy pulled the entire garage door off the tracks and on top of himself. At first we thought it was a freak accident. Now we think he's either a bull in a china cabinet or he's a meth head. ??

    Kate, Something is definitely fishy about him. If they didn't have 3 small kids, they'd be gone. They've been late on rent twice and they've only been there 3 months. WTH.

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  10. *sigh* I live underneath knuckleheads like this. When I run into them in the stairwell they are always telling me that they've called the landlord for this or that ridiculous thing (of course they never think it's ridiculous). I think in the three years I've lived here I've called the landlord twice.

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  11. Ohh MAN!!! ... I don't think I would have as much self control :-)

    LMAO @ Sharon, HA HAAAAA !!!!!!!!!

    This post is so much fun for something "not so fun"

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  12. Dingo, I know. I've rented houses, apartments, etc... and I only called if it was a super emergency and only after I was certain there was actually a problem. I swear, this guy has my husband's number on speed dial.

    Speedy, Yes. Sharon is hilarious! And you know, at first my husband was really mad, but now all we do is laugh about it. There's always humor in everything. Well almost everything. At least with renters!

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JUST SAY IT!!!